SmokeLong Quarterly

Do you take issue with capitalism?

Yes.

Seriously, what’s your beef?

Basically, my beef is that even pro-capitalist econ theory texts like The Road to Serfdom by Hayek espouse a need for a level playing field before the market can use its invisible hand to effectively delegate resources and value and whatever. We don’t have anything close to a level playing field in America—far from it: We live in a country where certain racial minorities are far more likely to be harassed by police than white citizens, where neighborhood income level affects the quality of educational opportunities, where women often make a fraction of what men do. The list goes on and on. So, my beef is that we live in a nation of great inequality and inequity and capitalism perpetuates that.

The free market.

Is an interesting theoretical concept, but is not actually an accurate way of describing the American economy.

Changing gears, what comes on the Sunrise Bistro Xpress breakfast burrito?

Choice of meat (sausage, ham, or bacon—but clearly sausage is the correct choice), potatoes, onions, peppers, eggs, cheddar and pepper jack cheese (two cheeses = twice as Amerrrican), served with grits and salsa.

What is the name of the Lifetime documentary within which the narrator finds herself trapped? When does it air? Are there encore showtimes?

She is trapped in a Lifetime movie called Diary of a Consumer: A Daunting Tale of Choosing Between 37 Grubhub Delivery Options and Deciding to Drink a Bottle of Wine from Trader Joe’s and Go to Bed. It airs at 9 p.m. on Sunday night, and then again at 1 a.m.